Wow. it has been a really long time.
I guess I dropped the poor blog in favor of that hussy facebook.
Sorry.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Remembering
http://ladyluck-stuffandnonsense.blogspot.com/2007/08/its-been-while-since-i-posted-anything.html
It has been two years now. I will say that this year, there is so much less pain, lots more remembering. TinyJ was only with us for a few weeks, but was recieved with so much love.
Hugs to all mommies who have a tiny empty spot in their hearts due to pregnancy loss.
It has been two years now. I will say that this year, there is so much less pain, lots more remembering. TinyJ was only with us for a few weeks, but was recieved with so much love.
Hugs to all mommies who have a tiny empty spot in their hearts due to pregnancy loss.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Can I get some input?
Church...
Yeah, yeah, I know WE are the church. What I'm talking about --or would like to talk about with your help, is the church gathering that we attend.
What is church for? Is it for the believers to come and be fed, equipped and encouraged? is it for outreach to bring sinners into so they will find Jesus? What should our non-negotiables be when it come to choosing a church?
How dedicated should a "good christian" be to their church? Is it ok to go to one church for Sunday worship and to a different church for weekly meetings and activities?
I would greatly appreciate some thoughts... biblical thoughts even better.
Yeah, yeah, I know WE are the church. What I'm talking about --or would like to talk about with your help, is the church gathering that we attend.
What is church for? Is it for the believers to come and be fed, equipped and encouraged? is it for outreach to bring sinners into so they will find Jesus? What should our non-negotiables be when it come to choosing a church?
How dedicated should a "good christian" be to their church? Is it ok to go to one church for Sunday worship and to a different church for weekly meetings and activities?
I would greatly appreciate some thoughts... biblical thoughts even better.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Happy Birthday Jules!
Today I am old. I know that I am old because my baby sister is 29 today. I am older than she is, so if she is 29... Heaven only knows how old that makes me!
It seems like for women 29 is more of a milestone birthday than 30 is. We get plagued with all these thoughts about what we have accomplished and if we are really ready to enter middle age and all that other stuff. If the 20's are about finding your place in this world, then the 30's are about being secure in that place we seem to have found ourselves.
I remember when my mom was expecting Julie, I believe she told us as we were coming home from a birthday party for Denise Bazo. I don't know if that is correct, but for some reason that is what I have in my head. I do know that mom was pretty sick, especially the few months before Julie was born. I remember cooking for the family. Now, we did have some older girls from church who came in some, and I'm sure my dad (who was an EXCELLENT cook) cooked a lot, but I know that I also cooked, standing on a chair in the kitchen, producing the 2 or 3 things I knew how to do. Scrambled eggs, hotdogs, macaroni and cheese. And please let me point out that the mac and cheese was REAL, not from a box with powdered cheese. Now... the eggs may or may not have been embellished with the addition of food coloring, and it's quite likely the mac and cheese had worcstishire sauce in it (I had a rather long "stage" of doing that to nearly everything), but it worked. I can only hope that my poor bedridden mom didn't have to eat these things and that someone was slipping her real food.
But I digress, this is about Julie. Anyway, I was sent to spend the night with the Massingill family while my grandma took Mom to the hossy to get Julie out. I got a call early in the morning letting me know that "cuddles" (as we had dubbed her in utero) was born and that she was a sister. I believe that was the last time she was called cuddles. No offence Julie, but you were a bit on the long and bony side.
There are a few other memories of Julie in her babyhood that I will not share, although for the right price, you may email me for details.
I am 7 1/2 years older than Julie, so by the time she was an actual person (as opposed to a cute little toddler kid) I was heading out for college. The times we did cross paths were a bit rocky at times, but even then ( as I was a SO mature college student and she was going through her own series of "stages") I was proud of her.
The summer she was 14 we went on TLC together. This is one of those things that was a mistake but was in fact, a "God-thing" The age limit for TLC was 15. I was supposed to go, but started feeling like I really belonged at home to spend time with Julie instead of trotting off to Guatemala. On the other hand, our team was made up of several of my very dear friends and I really wanted to go. I talked to Tom (team leader) about it and he told me to go talk to Mrs. B. Well, I did. And she said yes. Although I think I found out later that she didn't realize that Julie was too young. Anyway, we went together and I really started getting to know her. She also got to spend a lot of time with some of the best people I knew and I know that it was a very positive thing for her to get to know them.
I have so many other memories I could share, but that wasn't what I was intending to write about.
Julie, I have been in awe of you since you were a kid. We are so very different, in nearly every way, and in you I see so many things that I admire and wish I could be. You march to your own drum (forget the different drummer, you just play your own darn drum), you are strong, you stick up for the underdog, you see the worst in people but continually have faith in the best. You make your own rules and throw convention out the window. You are fiercely loyal. You are honest.... painfully so. I'd never want to meet you in a dark alley, but can't think of anyone I'd rather have beside me if I ever had to go down one myself. You ARE the caped avenger. You are an amazing friend, you give and give and give again. You have become an outstanding daughter (hmm, can I say that seeing as how I'm just a bystander and not the actual mother?) and I'm so proud of you.
You have made a place for yourself in your career. You have enough confidence to get the job done and enough humility to never stop learning more. I hope that the people who work beside you every day realize how fortunate they are to be around such an excellent human bean as you are. My prayer for you on this birthday is that you would find the same confidence in your "Julie" life as you have in your "medic" life. You knew even before you got out of high school what you wanted to become and you have done it. My challenge for you on this birthday is for you now to know who you want to become... and do it. My assurance for you on this birthday is that you are surrounded by people who love you and believe in you and are so stinkin' proud of you that we can hardly talk about you without sounding cheesy.
I love you Spotser, Happy 29th Birthday.
It seems like for women 29 is more of a milestone birthday than 30 is. We get plagued with all these thoughts about what we have accomplished and if we are really ready to enter middle age and all that other stuff. If the 20's are about finding your place in this world, then the 30's are about being secure in that place we seem to have found ourselves.
I remember when my mom was expecting Julie, I believe she told us as we were coming home from a birthday party for Denise Bazo. I don't know if that is correct, but for some reason that is what I have in my head. I do know that mom was pretty sick, especially the few months before Julie was born. I remember cooking for the family. Now, we did have some older girls from church who came in some, and I'm sure my dad (who was an EXCELLENT cook) cooked a lot, but I know that I also cooked, standing on a chair in the kitchen, producing the 2 or 3 things I knew how to do. Scrambled eggs, hotdogs, macaroni and cheese. And please let me point out that the mac and cheese was REAL, not from a box with powdered cheese. Now... the eggs may or may not have been embellished with the addition of food coloring, and it's quite likely the mac and cheese had worcstishire sauce in it (I had a rather long "stage" of doing that to nearly everything), but it worked. I can only hope that my poor bedridden mom didn't have to eat these things and that someone was slipping her real food.
But I digress, this is about Julie. Anyway, I was sent to spend the night with the Massingill family while my grandma took Mom to the hossy to get Julie out. I got a call early in the morning letting me know that "cuddles" (as we had dubbed her in utero) was born and that she was a sister. I believe that was the last time she was called cuddles. No offence Julie, but you were a bit on the long and bony side.
There are a few other memories of Julie in her babyhood that I will not share, although for the right price, you may email me for details.
I am 7 1/2 years older than Julie, so by the time she was an actual person (as opposed to a cute little toddler kid) I was heading out for college. The times we did cross paths were a bit rocky at times, but even then ( as I was a SO mature college student and she was going through her own series of "stages") I was proud of her.
The summer she was 14 we went on TLC together. This is one of those things that was a mistake but was in fact, a "God-thing" The age limit for TLC was 15. I was supposed to go, but started feeling like I really belonged at home to spend time with Julie instead of trotting off to Guatemala. On the other hand, our team was made up of several of my very dear friends and I really wanted to go. I talked to Tom (team leader) about it and he told me to go talk to Mrs. B. Well, I did. And she said yes. Although I think I found out later that she didn't realize that Julie was too young. Anyway, we went together and I really started getting to know her. She also got to spend a lot of time with some of the best people I knew and I know that it was a very positive thing for her to get to know them.
I have so many other memories I could share, but that wasn't what I was intending to write about.
Julie, I have been in awe of you since you were a kid. We are so very different, in nearly every way, and in you I see so many things that I admire and wish I could be. You march to your own drum (forget the different drummer, you just play your own darn drum), you are strong, you stick up for the underdog, you see the worst in people but continually have faith in the best. You make your own rules and throw convention out the window. You are fiercely loyal. You are honest.... painfully so. I'd never want to meet you in a dark alley, but can't think of anyone I'd rather have beside me if I ever had to go down one myself. You ARE the caped avenger. You are an amazing friend, you give and give and give again. You have become an outstanding daughter (hmm, can I say that seeing as how I'm just a bystander and not the actual mother?) and I'm so proud of you.
You have made a place for yourself in your career. You have enough confidence to get the job done and enough humility to never stop learning more. I hope that the people who work beside you every day realize how fortunate they are to be around such an excellent human bean as you are. My prayer for you on this birthday is that you would find the same confidence in your "Julie" life as you have in your "medic" life. You knew even before you got out of high school what you wanted to become and you have done it. My challenge for you on this birthday is for you now to know who you want to become... and do it. My assurance for you on this birthday is that you are surrounded by people who love you and believe in you and are so stinkin' proud of you that we can hardly talk about you without sounding cheesy.
I love you Spotser, Happy 29th Birthday.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Fear is a bad word?
Warning: Adult content, if your kids were just looking over your shoulder seeing the cute pictures, now is the time to have them go do something else.
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On a message board I frequent, many of the moms recently got into a discussion about the things our kids face today, specifically becoming sexually active in lower grades, down to 5-6th grades, and also the increasing popularity of having group slumber parties that are expressly for having same-gender sex. I don't even need to explain my stand on all of that, but what really got me thinking were the comments about how inevitable it is and how all we can do is talk to our kids and hope they will be open with us and make good mature choices, blah blah blah.
Here's the deal. I don't think that even in this current world (which I admit freely is far worse then when I was a child/teen 20+ years ago) that this type of thing is inevitable! I refuse to accept that. However, I also know that if their plan consists of talking and hoping, they are right. Let me be blunt. I was not a sexually active teen. In fact, I married so late, I was hardly a sexually active 20-something. In my case, it wasn't because of talking and hoping. It was because instilled deep within my very being, there was the sure and certain knowledge of being immediately struck down by God and the fact that no matter if I was 15 or 25, my Mother would somehow KNOW.
What I'm saying is that trying to reason with hormones is a losing battle. You can "know" all about STDs, you can "know" about pregnancy, you can "know" about the emotional ramifications...but that isn't necessarily going to do the trick.
Again, back to that discussion. There were a few comments about how they were going to give their children "all the information" so they could make "right decisions" and not rely on Bible-thumping or fear.
That sounds great doesn't it?
Let's apply that to, oh, a 2 year old. "Honey, this is an electric outlet. I know you are very curious and your curiosity is your strongest drive right now, but I want to let you know all the information so you can be smart." You would then procede to tell him about electricity, how good and powerful it is, but how it must be kept in wires and only accessed properly. You would tell him of the dangers and even how it could kill him. (so far so good, right?) You finish off by telling him that if he really must stick a hairpin in the outlet to please use these insulated gloves and if he ever has any more questions, to come have another talk with you.
I do of course realize that the above is exaggerated. But come ON... you know what my kids know about electricity? that it is BAD! HOT! NO! OWIE! that if you even go close to an outlet or a plug Mommy materializes out of thin air and SWATS that hand.
Perhaps I go too far because now when the older two are big enough that I might actually tell them to go plug this or that in, they stare at me as though I just told them to drink poison and remind me that they are NOT ALLOWED to even THINK of touching a power plug!
Now, since Jeff is an electrical engineer, they do know a bit about the actual workings of it, but allow me to lay it out plainly; It is NOT their knowledge about the power and potential of electic current that keeps them conditioned to not touch it, it is their FEAR.
Personally, I like that fear. That fear kept them alive long enough to reach the age where they CAN learn about AC/DC and wattage and amperage and voltage.
I'm not advocating that we don't educate our children about sex. I am saying that just knowing the facts isn't enough to keep them safe (and by safe, I mean abstinence). The drive is far stronger than the ability to reason. When faced with those choices, they need enough good old fashioned FEAR to keep them from getting into the place of temptation.
I've heard people say that they don't want their children to obey out of fear but out of love and respect.
Well Duh.
Brilliant deduction there.
Unfortunately, humans are selfish beings, must be a design flaw, take it up with God. In the meantime understand this; a respect that has enough weight to overcome selfish urges takes a while to grow and a certain amount of maturity to develop. I love (and as far as I can remember have always loved her) my mother. However, the deep respect and honor for her developed along the way, and dare I say, is still growing? If my obedience to her was based on my ability to respect her and defer to her wisdom, I wouldn't have obeyed her until I was about 23. That's a bit too late. I'm talking about a fear that is a percursor to respect and honor, a fear that keeps us within the walls, so to speak, until we are mature enough to love the walls and what they protect us from.
When and why did fear develop such a bad rep? You don't think it could be part of a diabolical plan to keep us from getting wisdom... nah, surely the enemy of our souls wouldn't do that, would he?
Personally, I think bit of the right kind of fear is a great thing. And I plan on using it to protect my kids from things far more dangerous than the electric outlets.
**disclaimer. I have not yet raised my children to this age. I am speaking from experience of a child that this worked with, not as a parent who has done it successfully.
.
.
.
.
.
On a message board I frequent, many of the moms recently got into a discussion about the things our kids face today, specifically becoming sexually active in lower grades, down to 5-6th grades, and also the increasing popularity of having group slumber parties that are expressly for having same-gender sex. I don't even need to explain my stand on all of that, but what really got me thinking were the comments about how inevitable it is and how all we can do is talk to our kids and hope they will be open with us and make good mature choices, blah blah blah.
Here's the deal. I don't think that even in this current world (which I admit freely is far worse then when I was a child/teen 20+ years ago) that this type of thing is inevitable! I refuse to accept that. However, I also know that if their plan consists of talking and hoping, they are right. Let me be blunt. I was not a sexually active teen. In fact, I married so late, I was hardly a sexually active 20-something. In my case, it wasn't because of talking and hoping. It was because instilled deep within my very being, there was the sure and certain knowledge of being immediately struck down by God and the fact that no matter if I was 15 or 25, my Mother would somehow KNOW.
What I'm saying is that trying to reason with hormones is a losing battle. You can "know" all about STDs, you can "know" about pregnancy, you can "know" about the emotional ramifications...but that isn't necessarily going to do the trick.
Again, back to that discussion. There were a few comments about how they were going to give their children "all the information" so they could make "right decisions" and not rely on Bible-thumping or fear.
That sounds great doesn't it?
Let's apply that to, oh, a 2 year old. "Honey, this is an electric outlet. I know you are very curious and your curiosity is your strongest drive right now, but I want to let you know all the information so you can be smart." You would then procede to tell him about electricity, how good and powerful it is, but how it must be kept in wires and only accessed properly. You would tell him of the dangers and even how it could kill him. (so far so good, right?) You finish off by telling him that if he really must stick a hairpin in the outlet to please use these insulated gloves and if he ever has any more questions, to come have another talk with you.
I do of course realize that the above is exaggerated. But come ON... you know what my kids know about electricity? that it is BAD! HOT! NO! OWIE! that if you even go close to an outlet or a plug Mommy materializes out of thin air and SWATS that hand.
Perhaps I go too far because now when the older two are big enough that I might actually tell them to go plug this or that in, they stare at me as though I just told them to drink poison and remind me that they are NOT ALLOWED to even THINK of touching a power plug!
Now, since Jeff is an electrical engineer, they do know a bit about the actual workings of it, but allow me to lay it out plainly; It is NOT their knowledge about the power and potential of electic current that keeps them conditioned to not touch it, it is their FEAR.
Personally, I like that fear. That fear kept them alive long enough to reach the age where they CAN learn about AC/DC and wattage and amperage and voltage.
I'm not advocating that we don't educate our children about sex. I am saying that just knowing the facts isn't enough to keep them safe (and by safe, I mean abstinence). The drive is far stronger than the ability to reason. When faced with those choices, they need enough good old fashioned FEAR to keep them from getting into the place of temptation.
I've heard people say that they don't want their children to obey out of fear but out of love and respect.
Well Duh.
Brilliant deduction there.
Unfortunately, humans are selfish beings, must be a design flaw, take it up with God. In the meantime understand this; a respect that has enough weight to overcome selfish urges takes a while to grow and a certain amount of maturity to develop. I love (and as far as I can remember have always loved her) my mother. However, the deep respect and honor for her developed along the way, and dare I say, is still growing? If my obedience to her was based on my ability to respect her and defer to her wisdom, I wouldn't have obeyed her until I was about 23. That's a bit too late. I'm talking about a fear that is a percursor to respect and honor, a fear that keeps us within the walls, so to speak, until we are mature enough to love the walls and what they protect us from.
When and why did fear develop such a bad rep? You don't think it could be part of a diabolical plan to keep us from getting wisdom... nah, surely the enemy of our souls wouldn't do that, would he?
Personally, I think bit of the right kind of fear is a great thing. And I plan on using it to protect my kids from things far more dangerous than the electric outlets.
**disclaimer. I have not yet raised my children to this age. I am speaking from experience of a child that this worked with, not as a parent who has done it successfully.
Pictures April/May
so I guess you need to blame FaceBook for the utter lack of attention shown to my blog recently. Sorry.
Jonny with Mom-mom (my mom) during our visit there in April. They were pretty fond of each other.
Jonny with Mom-mom (my mom) during our visit there in April. They were pretty fond of each other.
We visited Lazy5 Ranch while in NC, it was our second time but Jeff's first time. He greatly enjoyed it, especially the cows.
Recent pictures of Jonny. He is 8 months old now, hard to believe. He has a tooth, he can clap, he pulls up and then holds on with just one hand. 
Joyana, apparently feeling just fabulous!
Mr. Thoughtful. What does go on in that little brain?
Joyana, apparently feeling just fabulous!
Mr. Thoughtful. What does go on in that little brain?
This horse has seen better days, but they still enjoy it.
Best buds
For Mother's Day I asked to go strawberry picking. Here are my helpers smashing berries to make jam.
We got a little over 17 lbs.
Best buds
For Mother's Day I asked to go strawberry picking. Here are my helpers smashing berries to make jam.
We got a little over 17 lbs.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Civics 101
Thanks to my great friend Don, I was made aware of the national effort to hold local tea parties on tax day. I located the party nearest to us and since it was just up the street, decided to take part.
The kids and I made posters and I tried to explain on their level what it was all about. I wanted to do video clips of them each explaining their signs but they froze up when I tried to record them, so I'll just write it out.
Joey carried a sign based on the famous Gadsden flag. He learned that Ben Franklin used the rattlesnake to symbolize our country in the early days because the snake would give ample warning, but once it began to strike back, would not stop. The colonists warned the King many times that they would not continue to stand for the mistreatment, but finally struck back.
In his words,
"My sign has a rattlesnake and says 'don't tread on me' that means do not step on me or jump on me because we will fight back. The government is spending our money without asking us, that is wrong. It is like stealing. I'm hiding my money. I'm pretty sure stealers shouldn't be our leaders. If I were the leader I would not steal, I would make good rules, like, 'don't litter'. If the leaders keep doing this we will say,'you're fired!' just like the 'You're fired!' show. And we will dump our tea into the sea."
As far as the gathering itself, I was pleased with the results. It was a very cold and wet day, but I know there were several hundred people there. We got there a bit late and stayed for about an hour. I know that at least one Congressman was there, hopefully he got the message.
The kids and I made posters and I tried to explain on their level what it was all about. I wanted to do video clips of them each explaining their signs but they froze up when I tried to record them, so I'll just write it out.
Joey carried a sign based on the famous Gadsden flag. He learned that Ben Franklin used the rattlesnake to symbolize our country in the early days because the snake would give ample warning, but once it began to strike back, would not stop. The colonists warned the King many times that they would not continue to stand for the mistreatment, but finally struck back.
In his words,
"My sign has a rattlesnake and says 'don't tread on me' that means do not step on me or jump on me because we will fight back. The government is spending our money without asking us, that is wrong. It is like stealing. I'm hiding my money. I'm pretty sure stealers shouldn't be our leaders. If I were the leader I would not steal, I would make good rules, like, 'don't litter'. If the leaders keep doing this we will say,'you're fired!' just like the 'You're fired!' show. And we will dump our tea into the sea."
Jessi's thoughts:
"Taxes are when we all give a little bit of our money for the government to use for things we all need, like roads and the Army. But, then they decide to spend it on stupid things and there is no more money for the things we need. That is SO wrong! I thought they were good guys, would they treat their own wife and kids like this? NO! So why are they trying to do it to us? My Daisies verse says to 'treat everyone with respect' and they are not respecting us! I think the police should stop them."
Jessi actually had two signs, one that she created completely on her own and one that I planned out and she colored, cut, and pasted. Her personal sign is below. She says it is a judge banging his hammer and telling the government guys to stop wasting money.
The large sign she carried at the tea party was this one:
Joy's opinion was brief, but heartfelt:
"Stop taking my money, I'm just a kid and that is RUDE." 
I tried to make this a true learning opportunity and not just have it be about me using the kids holding signs for a good photo op. At several points when we were disucssing the wording, they wanted to include epithets like "stinky-head" and I made sure to tell them that even when we don't like them, we must respect them. The way to change things is not to call ugly names, but to first ask them to stop, and if that doesn't work, tell them that we won't choose them again next time. ... I think they learned that lesson better than many adults I know. 
As far as the gathering itself, I was pleased with the results. It was a very cold and wet day, but I know there were several hundred people there. We got there a bit late and stayed for about an hour. I know that at least one Congressman was there, hopefully he got the message.
For the most part the signs were quite bipartisan, addressing the issues and not trying to lay blame on one party or another.
Yes, Jonny was there, you can see the top of his bumble bee hat in the picture with Uncle Sam above.
I think that all in all, it was a great opportunity for the kids to see and participate, and it certainly made it more interesting for them than just having a lesson about it.
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